new year's resolutions

Every year I contemplate making resolutions, and after the new year arrives, I still haven't put a list together and then it's too late. I recall making a handful of post hoc resolutions based on what I had or hadn't already done (calisthenics) or consumed (dessert, pop--or soda/coke depending on your geographic location) that particular year. Oh, the resolutions of yore!

These days I think realistic resolutions might read something like this:
1. Finish reading a half dozen books I've started.
2. Try to exercise more regularly (key word is "try" here, people).
3. Show up 1-4 minutes late to children's appointments rather than 5-7 minutes late.
4. Try to start and finish laundry on designated laundry days (again, key word is "try.")

To be honest, I have mixed thoughts about New Year's resolutions. On the one hand, I love fresh starts. Each morning holds potential, every new week shows promise. On the other hand, it seems trivial to come up with some ways to improve myself that I might intentionally or unintentionally dismiss as February thaws to March--if I make it that far. What's worse is the false notion that I control my destiny: if I have enough will and muster enough determination, I can accomplish anything.

The truth is I can't do anything apart from my Father, and he knows full well how pathetic my resolve is despite my best intentions. But it doesn't mean I should be satisfied with the status quo, particularly when it comes to my spiritual life.

I've recently been struck by the connection between grace and gratitude. In her book Living into Commmunity, Christine Pohl writes, "If we really understand our lives as redeemed by costly grace, then our primary response can only be gratitude. It's at the center of Christian life." Remembering Christ's sacrifice postures me in humble gratitude and awe.

I want that attitude today. Tomorrow. All year. If I could write and keep one resolution this year, this would be it: ponder God's grace and grow in gratitude.