Much has changed since my last post...over 6 months ago. I marched into a new decade, added another little guy to our troop, we sold our house and are buying a new one.
I like to think that's the reason why I haven't been blogging lately, and it's true. Partially anyway. The bigger reason why is I don't think I have much to write about of value. I stay home full time with my children, and while I realize it is a HUGE responsibility and privilege, it's also a conversation killer. No, seriously.
(Dinner party scene. Moon-shaped clusters of people converse between sips of Pinot Noir and polite bites of crusty French bread topped with smoked gouda.)
Me: (turn to a newcomer) What brings you to the area?
Other: I'm a graduate student at the University.
Me: (food in mouth) What are you studying?
Other: (confidently rehearsed) I finished up my M.D. at Johns Hopkins, and now I'm working on my PhD specializing in pediatric cardiology transplants. How about you? What do you do?
Me: (brushing crumbs from my chest and spot a new red stain next to a faint spit-up one I apparently didn't wipe off well enough) I stay home full time with our children.
Other: (bewildered) Oh.
(Awkward pause. Newcomer turns to talk to someone else, so I do the same.)
Though the scene more commonly occurs in some public place of business or meeting a new person at church (not everyone I meet is working on a PhD), it has essentially the same effect: unless I'm talking to a fellow sister in the trenches, no one asks a follow-up question.
I was reminded of a famous expression to "write what you know" this past week, and I've decided to embrace the experiences God has given me as fodder for my writing. Though I'm not pursuing a PhD in pediatric cardiology transplants, I know sacrifice and sleep deprivation. I know diapers, dishes. I know laundry--piles of it. I know boys. I know messes and mercy. I know fear of failure, fear of man. I know love, loss, worry. I know joy. Hope. And I know Christ--in part, not yet whole.
This was a wonderful post Orpah. It struck me that I often have the opposite problem, or perhaps the same problem only as an academic trying to connect with the wonderful world of motherhood, which for some reason known only to God was not in the cards for me. It can work both ways. But not with you! I'd love to talk sometime, about your world and mine. Hope it can happen soon. I'm excited to hear about your new location and your new son and your new decade.
ReplyDeleteI'm often reminded the Lord has different ways of growing and sanctifying us through the work, circumstances, and people he places in our lives. It can be easy to wear our particular role in life as a badge of honor (which too quickly turns into a source of pride) that defines and compartmentalizes us. That is what I find so compelling about the body of Christ: we are unified in our common purpose through the work of Christ, and we are free to serve him with the gifts he designated us. Though you may not be a physical mother to any children, Michelle, the Lord has certainly blessed you with the wisdom to spiritually nurture those around you. I count myself one of them with gratitude.
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